Post by `november, on Jan 1, 2012 23:28:53 GMT -5
anan
SAVE ME FROM THE NOTHING IVE BECOME.
SAVE ME FROM THE NOTHING IVE BECOME.
name...Anan
age...Eighty-four ( seven years )
gender...male
clan...Outsider
position...Loner
species...Siberian Tiger
apperance...build ; Anan is a fairly large cat, and a single glance could prove that to any simple minded creature. He stands at forty-three inches. Like all Siberian Tigers, he is a rather stocky fellow as well, having some what short, round legs. He's a good deal longer than he is tall. His skull is large, and round, with a slight dome shape between his ears. His ears themselves are round, and fluffy, filled with thick fur. His muzzle is square, protruding off his face only a little bit more than it is in width. His neck is this, and round, supporting his head easily, and attaching to well muscled broad shoulders. His paws, on all four legs, are large and slightly rounded in shape, with thick pads protecting them from the terrain that he walks upon. His chest is rather deep, and wide, while his abdomen is tucked up ever so slightly. His hind legs are strong and powerful, and easily propelling him along with out much effort on his part. His tail is long, and whip like. It's thick at the base, tapering off slightly before coming to an end, at nearly three and a half feet away from the base of it.
coat ; Anan's fur is easy to describe, seeing as it's typical to a tiger's. His coat consist of two three colors. The warm, but dull orange, the pitch black, and the grayish white. The majority of his body is covered in the orange color, while his chin, throat, chest, belly, and the inner part of all four legs, inside of his ears, and on the bottom part of his paws, around his pads is all white. Obviously, the stripes that make his coat different from that of any tigers, the things of which make him part of the Tiger population, but still unique as an individual, are a deep black color. His fur itself is soft in texture, while still being fairly coarse, and weather proof. His coat is always well groomed, seeing as he takes great pride in the one thing that makes him different from any other creature out there.
eyes ; Anan's eyes are actually the one thing, or well two things, that make him an unforgettable creature. They're a stunningly deep amber. Their dark hue catches in the light, often, causing them to illuminate into a brilliant orange, or yellow color depending on how they're touched. Though, their rich color isn't the only thing that makes them stand out from the rest of him. His eyes above anything are the one thing that bring his emotions to the surface. There's never a moment where his eyes aren't swimming with vibrant emotions, telling anyone brave enough to look into their depths of his true, inner feelings.
voice ; His voice is something of which draws others in. His voice is deep, though for a being as soft spoken as him it is strange that his voice is actually the deep tone that it is. His voice is always quite, seeing as he's never one to become loud or boisterous. The sounds that roll from his throat are always gentle, like a father singing a sweet lullaby to his child, or perhaps a emotionally wounded individual with more history than what one may think from his outwardly appearance. Either way, many find his voice to be fairly attractive, the soft hint of some unknown accent that can be detected on more words than others just captures them even more.
scars ; Scar wise, Anan is quite lacking. Seeing as he's never one for violence unless it's necessary, one could guess that he's a mostly un scared individual. But even so, he does have several that just make him more of his own. The only highly noticeable scar is one that runs along his right hip, from the top, to near where the knee joint is. Another would be a scar that runs over his front left paw, stretching across the entire width of his paw in a slight arch across the 'knuckles' of the digits. How he got them will be explained in his history.
personality...There are parts of Anan's personality that none never see, or a rare few. Then on the same note there are parts that are there for the world to see. While he affiliates with no clan, choosing the life of a loner, Anan is actually quite the obedient creature. This aspect having been formed during his kit-hood, has been something that he's held onto for his entire life. Anan, once you have gained his trust is one who when you say 'climb', he'll ask 'how high'. At the same time though, there is a limit to what he will do. He knows the difference between right, and wrong, and holds himself highly to the standards that he has for them. Though, just how far he'll go is beyond many, seeing as only one has pushed him to that brink. As one would think, along with being obedient he is a loyal being. Though, his loyalty is limited to only those he feels he can give such a thing to, and that is very few. As most see, he's usually a fairly determined individual. Once he sets his mind to something, he'll get said thing done, or die trying. This particular trait though, is something that is both a pro, and a con when it comes to him.
Anan, as many can tell is not one that is easily angered. It is unknown how he is so hard to anger, seeing as both his parents had short fuses, and temperaments that could make even fire cringe. But, that's not to say that Anan doesn't have a temper. He does, one that is equal, if not worse than his parents. But, self control, is something that he has an abundance of and because of that his level of which his temper will spark has shot up more than his parents' ever was. Though, it is this self control that also allows him to block nearly ever emotion that he has, including anything from heartache, to fury.
Self confidence; something of which that is non-existent with Anan. He looks down on himself, often beating himself up, mentally, for simple, easily made mistakes. He sees himself as a screw-up, more often than not. Why, is usually beyond the comprehension of most, seeing as they never know the actual depth of his emotions, nor of his history. Things as simple as making a twig crack while he's hunting is enough to trigger a self-loathing, and beating up that will last for a day or two. Anan is a fairly forgiving creature... Towards others, towards himself, not so much. In his mind, anything bad that happens to himself is entirely his fault, some kind of punishment for some sin he committed. More often than not, his mind will latch onto a particular action that he took before said event happened, and blame that as the reason for messing up, call that the reason for his punishment. Why, and how Anan became is unknown, not even he himself knowing how such a trait came around; he just knows he is this way.
Anan, as sappy as it sounds, is in love with the idea of love. Though, on the same token, he believes that the idea of he himself finding true, and 'real' love is an idea so absurd that it shouldn't even be though. He, as odd as it may seem, lives through others stories of love, often making up his own stories. Who does he tell them to, you ask? Himself. He talks to himself, aloud, as insane as it may seem. Though, he spends a good deal of time alone, and so who's he to talk to besides himself? Because he believe he doesn't deserve love, believes that such a thing is impossible for someone like him, he over looks any that might like him as anything more than a friend. More often then not, he's completely oblivious to emotions such as that from others towards himself.
Anan is a complex creature. He's loving, gentle, kind, and caring towards others. But his trust has long since been broken, every bit as much as his heart with. Attempting to understand him is nearly an impossible task, not even forces much more divine than a living creature could truly grasp his entire personality.
history...Anan's earliest memories where of a cave, that served as the den his mother had chosen. He had one other sibling, a smaller female, who died nearly three moons after birth due to inflammation of the brain, which had been caused by a parasite that had some how gotten into her body. Anan as a youngster had been quite energetic, with a wild imagination. Even after the dead of his sister, he managed to keep himself entertained, and amused for hours on end with his made up games. He even served as a source of entertainment for his mother, who found the stories that her young one managed to weave. During that early time in his life, despite the fact that he and his mother where nearly completely isolated, was relatively normal for one of his age. It wasn't until he ventured off on his own did his life start to change.
At two years old, his mother was killed. A run in with a larger male Tiger, that resulted in a fight ended his mother slain, and Anan being chased away from the male's territory, and away from the body of his mother.
He wasn't alone, for long though..
Six months after the death of his mother, Anan met an attractive female tiger. Her name was Katia. Anan believed her to be the one angel, a shining star when his world had been filled with a dusk like gloom, and heart aching loneliness since the slaughter of his mother. Their relationship seemed perfect, on the surface that is. He nearly worshiped her, he gave his heart to her, literally his very being to her. Though, the simple truth was that, Katia wasn't in her right mind; something of which Anan didn't realize until the birth of their first kit. It was a healthy young female, that was never named. "It is a custom in my bloodline, to not name kits until they are seven moons old," She had told him. Simply because his mind was clouded, covered by his love for her, he went along with it. The nameless kit never reached seven moons of age, not even making it to three.
It had been storming, Katia sending Anan out to fetch her some water from a near by stream. By the time of his return, the nameless kit lay on the floor of the den, half eaten by its own mother. Terror filled, Anan had attempted to get his mate to tell him her reasoning. She told him nothing, only complaining of the noise that the kit had made.
It wasn't until they where both five years old, did a second kit enter their lives. Anan refused to leave this kit alone with it's mother. It was a almost completely healthy male named Shardul. For nearly eight moons the trio traveled together, never once mother being left alone with her kit. The lesson had been learned from the first experience. Though, the insanity that had taken Katia's mind couldn't let Shardul be. He soon faced a fate much like his nameless sister.
That was the final stick. Anan couldn't live with the fact that disease of the mind had claimed his only true love.
Perhaps he himself had went a bit insane, though instead of a disease of the head, one of the heart plagued him. His mind darkened day by day, until he finally came to a logical solution. Do Katia the justice of sending her to the stars. He was never one to be a murderer, though had he been in his right mind, he would have seen the error in his thinking. He waited until they went to the waterfall that they frequented. He made it appear like an accident when he turned, pushing his mate over the side of the rocks, onto the jagged stones below, to her death. Only after the deed had been done did he regret it. Though, as he'd peered over the cliff side, he'd seen that there was no reversing his actions, no apologizing, no going back to how things had been.
For months, Anan had isolated himself, believing that it was he that was crazy. And thus began the mental change that would dictate who he is today.. His, as he put it, rise back into sanity...
